After the recent dismal poll results starting with Bihar and ending with local elections in Telengana/Kerala, (latest being J&K!) the Congress Party is in session. Veteran loyalist AK Antony is chairing the meeting. All usual suspects including G-23 are in attendance. The Sonia-Rahul-Priyanka triumvirate is invariably present with ‘don’t want to be president now,’ Rahul Gandhi hiding behind the incumbent Congress president warming the seat for him. It was decided it will be an interactive session with everyone allowed to speak freely. (Internal democracy isn’t dead in Cong yet!)
AK Antony: “I am calling the meeting to order. Good morning Soniaji, Rahulji, Priyankaji and all my brothers and sisters.” ( Since nobody can understand his English, everyone has been provided earphones with English to English translation facility.)
AKA continues: “ I wish to congratulate madam Soniaji Gandhiji for our success in 19 seats in Bihar. In UP, Gujarat, MP and Karnataka we lost due to AVM fraud. I wish to make a special mention of the efforts made by our leader Rahulji Gandhiji in Bihar. His fierce campaign helped Tejaswi Yadavji win 75 seats in Bihar! Tejaswiji has conveyed his grateful thanks to Rahulji for making him the Opposition leader.”
Kapil Sibal: “But we contested 70 seats in Bihar and won only 19…”
AKA: “Negativity can’t take the party forward! Enemy will even spread news that Rahul went to a hill station on picnic with Priyanka family during Bihar campaign! Next question please.”
Gulam Nabi Azad: “All the 8 seats in Gujarat won by NDA including Cong defectors…”
AKA (interjects): “That’s why we paid tributes to Ahmedbhaiji Patelji before starting the meeting. It was too painful for him and added to the tragedy and we shouldn’t trouble the noble soul more”. (Crosses his chest and forehead looking skywards and gestures for next question.)
GNA (insistent): “We lost all 8 seats we contested in Gujarat. Almost all of those who defected to BJP from Cong got reelected…”
AKA (cuts GNA) : “We got seats in MP due to the hard work of Kamal Nathji. That he achieved that feat without Jyotiraditya support is really remarkable.”
GNA: “But all those who followed Scindhya out of Cong got reelected too-with few exceptions!”
Anand Sharma: “What about our poor show in our own turf Rajasthan? Then in the local polls in Telengana, Kerala- our traditional stronghold?”
AKA: (Irked at mention of Kerala knowing who is targeted here. Looks at Rahul’s direction) “People of Vayanad loves Rahulji. We all know that, don’t we?”
AS: “Yes we all know. What I ask is, why the bad showing in Kerala too, especially when incumbency and gold smuggling case had put the Left Govt on the backfoot? Could it be due to the infighting and groupism in the faction ridden Cong in Kerala?”
AKA: (Stunned!) “ Er.. well… I mean… the fact is…”
Manish Tiwari: “Whatever the fact is, we have lost where we could have won easily taking advantage of the vulnerability of the Vijayan regime had we planned and worked to a coordinated strategy. This is simply missing not only in Kerala but all over India with devastating results for the national party as a whole. We the well meaning seniors have been trying to bring this to the notice of the Cong Central leadership and look what we got- branded as G-23 and ousted from our official positions as if we were some kind of traitors!...”
There’s stunned silence in the hall. AK Antony asks for water and calls for a hand-fan. Sonia pretends busy reading something and Rahul who was craning his neck over her shoulder to show he was taking interest in the proceedings has withdrawn it and is not visible now. Priyanka looks on nonchalantly with a noncommittal amused look which doesn’t convey anything. Dr. Shashi Tharoor has the perennial smiling, pleasant look but his mind certainly is probing the most apt but longest English word in dictionary to describe the present situation. But whatever he may dig out, his present expression after the Manish Tiwari delivery is that of admiration!
MT: (Continues) “The very edifice of the great INC is crumbling and there’s no initiative from the Cong leadership to do anything about it. I and my colleagues as sincere dedicated Congressmen who would die as true Congressmen, are aghast at the directionless drift of the party. We understand Soniaji is unwell but Rahulji’s indecisiveness and unplanned, inconsistent (apologies to Sharad Pawarji) one man roadshows, are costing the party.”
“ Modi regime is systematically destroying all democratic institutions and slowly but steadily dividing the country communally towards achieving it’s avowed aim of a religious state. But what are we doing to counter it? Simply nothing! After all the recent setbacks what are we doing? - keep licking our wounds which would never heal because fresh wounds are being inflicted with impunity by Modi/Shah and we don’t seem to put up even a fight! When will we revive party, shed it’s old baggage, reinvent and reposition it as a resurgent viable alternative to BJP, regain people’s trust - and acceptance?”
All G-23 members node their heads in unison. Other members like Surjewala, Pawan Khera, Alka Lamba, Supriya Srinate etc are in such a state of mind, they’re struggling to decide if to be sad or happy. To decide they look in the direction of the Gandhis. Sonia, not wanting to reveal her reaction, still appear busy reading and Priyanka continues with her blank expressionless smile! But Rahul who was sitting behind Sonia Gandhi is nowhere to be seen!
AK Antony who looked getting better with the glass of water and the breeze of the hand-fan, is lying down now. He has not recovered fully from the shock because his earphone translated Manish Tiwari English clearly into AK Antony English and he could fully grasp the essence of the outburst! He furtively looked at Sonia Gandhi for any kind of hint about her reaction - to no avail. He wondered if this is what the G-23 has been calling ‘introspection’! If it was so, he was confused if it’s a good or a bad thing! In any case he had to know what Rahuji thought about it. That was the only way to know if it was a good or a bad thing. He looked around for Rahul Gandhi.
Just then someone looking like a delivery boy came to him looking for Rahul Gandhi. The boy said. “Sir I can’t find Rahulji. Could you please hand this cover over to him?” He hands over a cover looking like from an airline Co. and said. “ Sir please tell him his airtickets to the Caribbean Islands are confirmed for tomorrow. Return by end of next month too, is confirmed.”
******
OVERHEARD
PM Modi was at the Punjab/Haryana – Delhi border to tackle the Farmer agitation over farmer bills which he thought was very good for them but somehow the farmers didn’t think so. Left with no option Modiji was forced to make them understand. So police was called in with the instructions to prevent them from entering Delhi at any cost!
He watched with trepidation when water cannons were trained at the farmers by the police. Modiji was simply flabbergasted when a passing kid mocked him. He said “ Uncle, you are supposed to water the farms – not the farmers!”
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